True Negro Theories: Pu**y Ransoms

27979707v2147483647_350x350_Front

Its been a minute….Yall ready, lets get it

So is it just me or do women tend to resort to holding their snatch for ransom when they become unhappy?  Its like the ultimate trump card to pull right? Which is funny because usually girls are the first ones to play the whole “sex isnt everything” card. Yet as soon as troubled water comes about best believe the first move will be her coming to bed in her finest brillo pad panties.

For some odd reason latley I have became the relationship go to guy for the homies. Why? No fucking clue! Shyt I still havent put together the mystery puzzle when it comes to the opposite sex. But yet instill they hit me up and I allow my ear to be whored for venting purposes..smh..Now some of them are married, some of them are in regular relationships, and some of them are..well…in a race to see who can empty out their entire nut sac first.  And what have I learned from all these varies convos over the last few months? I learned that maybe I should hold off on the idea of getting married for atleast decade or two..lol…

Now truth be told sex isnt the end all be all but its hella vital…especially in a mans world…Sex cant keep a relationship together but it sure can break one up (c) Keez. Its no different from a woman needing that emotional fix. Now if for some reason that daily quota of compliments, affection, cuddling, praise, appreciation isnt met then yall (just like us) will find some way to get that need fulfilled. But the difference between us an yall is that niggas dont naturally get upset and then say “You know what!  No compliments for her ass for atleast a month or two. If she keeps this shyt up, I will bring these muthafuckin hugs to a screeching halt.” That just doesnt happen…

But females? Eshhhhh…..My dude told me this story about how he had a pass one night to go out and kick it. Told the wife he would be home around 2-3 but ended up getting home around 3:30. 30 mins late, that aint bad. Could of been worse, he could of not came home..lol…Not to mention he forgot to wash her car earlier like he promised. Well needless to say 3-4 weeks went by and the entire time he recieve the “nigga no, hand slap, hand slap” treatment. He said one time he got up in the morning, went to the bathroom and could of swore he saw her clit in glass case sitting on the shelf of the medicine cabinet. After a while he got fed up and well lets just say she woke up to some thick whip creme on her left ass cheek.

So ladies stop holding ya vag for ransom. To keep it honest men dont need much in life. Some silence, a hot plate, little drama as possible, an occasional mouth hug, and drum roll………intercourse….Now how hard is that? Doesnt seem like much compared to the superman costume we have to wear for yall……..Remember some snatch a day will keep the side chicks away….

Advertisements

One Response to True Negro Theories: Pu**y Ransoms

  1. llate says:

    “You know what! No compliments for her ass for atleast a month or two. If she keeps this shyt up, I will bring these muthafuckin hugs to a screeching halt.”

    then they wondering why we be at the titty bar paying other chicks phone bill.

    going out to buy milk never returning.. that shit aint cool

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: