In all due recklesness, Keez has been in love a time or twice…
And the pain of heartbreak is an indescribable feeling of anguish that i’d never wish on my worst enemy, but if you’ve never been in love you’d never have to deal with the anguish and heartache of dealing with a lost love, and this is where my argument begins. Fellas, remember back in the day when love was for suckas and we’d recite lines like ‘Me give my heart to a woman, never happen, i’ll be forever mackin’ © Jigga, and really meant that? We’d change hoes like clothes, and wiped the tears from their eyes as we’d say goodbye, never knowing that feeling that we’d cause within her heart…and we really didn’t care, because she was just another notch under the belt, another broad we could brag to the homies about hittin, or another chic we could post on freaksonmyspace.com…(shout out to the fine folks at freaksonmyspace.com, i’ve found multiple women I coulda dealt with in the past on that site, lol). Until you met Miss Right…yeah, Miss Right, but she wasn’t Miss Right Away like the rest, or maybe she was, and that’s what kept you there, but nevertheless, it was something different about her, maybe you could watch the game with her and ya’ll drank a six pack together, but she was still sexy with it, or maybe, like in my case, you conversed with her just one time and immediately fell in…head first, because you realized that you had so much in common, and it wasn’t even on a sexual trip. You kick it and ya’ll become an item, meet each other’s families, the whole nine and then…welcome to heartbreak.
To all my lover’s out there, heartbreak is one hell of a place, no matter how you get there, maybe you got caught cheatin or you pushed her away because you didn’t think you were quite ready for a relationship, but the shit is a beast. Heartbreak is one of those places you’ll never forget visiting, but all I really remember is feeling constantly nauseated and feeling like my world was collapsing, yet somehow I had to fight through it, it was %#$@&’s (gotta protect the innocent’s name, lol) name on the brain all of the time, constantly checking my phone for a call or a text from her…that never came, not being able to eat, being anti-social, and depending on how deep the love for that person was, this feeling can last indefinitely, as many females I run to are scarred from previouscats © Musiq, and blame that on the next man, so again, my question is, when dealing with the negative aspects of love, is it really better to have love and lost than to have never loved at all?
In hindsight, i’m not like the average person…that person says that you have to learn to live with regrets, if I had the opportunity to change things in my past, I would change so many things, especially in love. I’d definitely change the fact that I messed up with a woman that may have been the closest thing i’ll get to the one…but life’s a bitch and so you move on. But I can’t help but to think, what if I would’ve never loved at all…like my mama always said, you can’t miss what you never had, which just means that if you never had that experience, how could you ever long for it? Granted, i’d miss out on all of the positives of being in love, the cupcaking, having that significant woman to confide in about life’s ups and downs, the intimacy, but i’d also miss out on the aforementioned 808s and heartbreaks, so is it really a losing situation to have never had that experience?
Why yes…you see, love is a dangerous necessity, a world famous mystery © Mos Def. To all my lover’s out there, is there really a better feeling in the world than to know that someone has your back 100%? For me to have missed out on those experiences I had where I loved and lost would be negating myself from one of life’s most beautiful and ugly experiences simultaneously, and I wouldn’t dare rob myself of that experience. To have loved and lost allowed me to understand the intricacies of my dealings with women, its allowed me to learn my emotional limitations and heights, and most importantly its allowed me to experience a piece of heaven on earth, for God is love, and to miss out on that experience would be robbing myself of a piece of heaven…and who would want to miss out on that?
So to all of my fellas forever stuck in that playa’s mentality, without having the experience of ever falling in love…let that shit go. I’m not saying try to fall in love with the next chickenhead you meet at the neighborhood Popeye’s…nah, but allow yourself to be open to having that experience, because it’s a beautiful thing.
With all that said, check out the second part of the Keez In Love Series, lol…’Don’t sell yourself to fall in love’ (c) Slum Village. No recklessness this week, besides the fact that after gettin on the scale Sunday, I need a gun point personal trainer (c) Corey Holcomb. I need somebody holdin an AK-47 over my fat ass, tellin me ‘Nigga, I wish you would give up on that last push up’, lol.