Bus Etiquette 101

So a nigga been ridin the bus lately…all the chickenheads, be quiet © Fat Man Scoop.

A nigga is catchin the bus for several reasons, even though I’m high yella, I still believe in going green, secondly, a nigga can’t find gas in Charlotte, seriously, niggas here are waiting in line for 2 hours to get gas, and Friday is payday, so a nigga is on his last leg, and you can’t wait in line for 2 hours, then ask for 2 on pump 12…shit just doesn’t make sense, another reason is parking is a bitch and I could use the extra dough to try to inspire the 8 million NIGGAS, who still haven’t registered to vote (I’ll get into this subject at a later time, but ain’t that about a bitch?) I guess if I was tryna impress the ladies who hit up our site, I wouldn’t be posting this, but ya’ll prolly wasn’t gon give me none no way, so fuck it, lol. But back to the subject…throughout my lifetime journey, a nigga has witnessed some of the most reckless shit in life…on the bus, so I’ve decided to share my class in Bus Etiquette 101

 

Just general bus etiquette…niggas, stop hollerin at chics on the bus…that ain’t the business. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve seen nigga a thru z get shot down by a chic on the bus, for some reason, the shit just don’t work. I feel like you gotta at least meet her at the mall, and have a couple phone conversations before you break it to her that you a bus ridin ass nigga…that’s a deep ass conversation, and it can make or break a relationship, cuz how many sistas are gonna ride the bus to see a nigga? Including my mama…none. You just gotta really think fellas, that’s y I say, if you gotta ride the bus, just holla at the hoodrats in ur own neighborhood, at least ya’ll can walk to the lil Chinese spot, and if the late night urge for a bootycall beckons you, its within walking distance. Nothing can be worse in life as a man, than to think you headed to a female’s house to get some, you realize she tryna make a nigga wait, and the last #3 just passed her house five minutes ago (ain’t that about a bitch?). Now you in a predicament, cuz you pissed, swole, and gotta ask her for some bus fare (cuz u intended to steal it out of her top drawer while that ass was sleep)…all in all, just not a good look fellas, so remember, when in doubt, a hoodrat ain’t all that bad if you got a bus pass, lol.

 

Another thing, and this shit happens to me all the time…I realize that busses get crowded and all, but why do niggas still sit in the seat next to you after everybody and they mama get off the bus? It’s always me, and some big funky ass nigga sittin next to each other on an empty bus (no homo). Granted, if the bus wasn’t driving through one of Charlotte’s worst hoods, I might say something to this nigga, but I got mind control over this nigga, cuz when I ring the bell, he get his big ass up.

 

Niggas…beg for your loose change before you get on the bus instead of holdin up the rest of us paying customers. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been on the bus with a nigga who just ain’t got the funds, the scene usually goes like this:

RN (Random Nigga)- (puts change into the register) “Damn, ya’ll…anybody got a Quarter?”

ORN (Other Random Nigga)- “Here you go playboy”

RN- “A my nigga, you got a dollar? I’m $1.05 short”

And that’s that bullshit I’m tryna tell ya’ll about, lol…you always gotta deal with that type of shit on the regular, and damnit, it gets old.

 

Lastly to my driving niggas, yeah, ya’ll need some bus stop etiquette too…its not polite to laugh at niggas who are waitin at the bus stop, cuz hell, I used to be yo ass,and now look at me, umbrella by my side and bus pass in hand…it could happen to you, especially if you got a bitter baby mama, you drive a Dodge, or your ride is in the impound from all them damn parking tickets. So ease up on laughin at a nigga, I’m a bus rider, and I’m sensitive about my shit © Badu, lol. Same thing goes for cute chics too…I be seein ya’ll eyeing me, thinking damn, he kinda cute, but I can’t mess with him cuz he on the bus, don’t sleep on a nigga boo, cuz the Dodge is still on deck at home, and can still make it through a Wendy’s drive thru, and a Sunoco station (to pick up the condoms and a slurpee…(gotta keep it safe)…we just gotta get some new brake pads, but imma be aight. Oh yeah, and when its raining outside, don’t splash a nigga, cuz karma is a bitch, lol’

 

And this type of shit happens like every single day © Snoop. This is my lesson in Bus Etiquette 101 for all my niggas who are going green/can’t afford parking/or are a lil down on their luck.

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4 Responses to Bus Etiquette 101

  1. t.polite says:

    LOL!!!

  2. ms. cali says:

    wow…

  3. mkey226 says:

    why i get the wow? ya’ll don’t know my struggle (c) corey holcomb, lol

  4. ms. cali says:

    between booty and sunoco needed 2 be in walking distance for the late night trips, and ninjas not having bus fair BEFORE they get on the bus… i lost it lol.

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